Meet today's McCain Voter Du Jour, Benjamin Babel.
Mr. Babel, frequently seen in stylish pinstripe suits and more than just a little stubble, makes his home in Sherman Oaks, California, where he owns with his wife Joanie a four-bedroom house on the "valley" side of the Hollywood Hills. Mr. Babel uses "Just for Men" and works in entertainment, where he's often consumed with telling a cadre of lower-salaried network employees why certain programing is best fit for the "Webisode treatment." Mr. Babel, who boasts that he doesn't like to read anything but "the good" biographies, admits that he recently sat idle as a member of his temple told his Indian daughter-in-law that she "doesn't count" at a recent Jewish prayer service ("something the girl clearly couldn't understand, I can't fault her"); he can also frequently be found waxing the BMW 7-series he bought at an August Van Nuys auction. Mr. Babel tips low at nearby sushi restaurants ("get that bluefin todayyyy, and maybe I'll give more than 8%"), buys McDonald's gourmet coffee three times a day ("tastes better than that pricey fair-trade crap"), and is proudly beating erectile dysfunction ("Viaga advertises during 'Mad Men,' there's nothing to be embarrassed about"). Mr. Babel also never exactly graduated college but scored an MBA at USC (note: this does not concern the fact that his doctor father built that university's hospital neurology wing, although how impressive is that?). Lastly, Mr. Babel also frequently cranks Tears for Fears and his favorite song "Freebird" on his office iPod dock and enjoys hunting small animals ("the big, rare ones don't deserve to die"). The quote he most wanted Glass Shallot to post on his McCain voter profile, however, is: "Self-reliance begins with seeing the world as an every man for himself sort of struggle." Touché, Mr. Babel! We appreciate you taking the time to share some of your personal details with Shallot readers and hope you're pleased with the election results.
Note: Glass Shallot Composite Profiles are fictional works composed of unusually creative fact-assemblage. In other words, they're more real than reality TV but less real than sit-com dialogue. You can't do this in journalism, but you can do it on a blog!
