Meet today's McCain Voter du Jour (and yes we know that's redundant!), Perry Highweather, Ph.D.
Dr. Highweather, a pseudonym, is a famously liberal professor of gender studies, renowned for her academic papers on feminism, and the only daughter of a famous army general. She was excited to chat with Shallot recently from her Austin, Texas office, where she often holds impromptu discussions among the U of T student body concerning the inequality among the sexes and why a thinking young woman should vote for Obama. "I have to say that I see Sarah Palin as an egregious impediment to this progress," she admits. "But I still can't personally vote for Obama. So I'm doing my part by holding my classes. I mean, I know my girls will have much less of a chance to live in a world where Roe v. Wade continues to thrive, but I just don't think I can personally live with a president who hasn't served in the military. Now, if a woman who had served in the military were running, that would be another story!" When questioned why Dr. Highweather cares so much about putting a military man in the White House, she couldn't contain herself. "Well, I'm a little embarrassed to say it, but since it's just between us: They're hot! Especially when they've sustained injuries from torture. I don't know, that's sort of my thing. You're not going to use my name in this article are you? I only agreed to this interview under conditions of anonymity. Anyway, I'm spinning most of my disciples towards Obama, so what does it matter what I do?" Don't worry, Dr. Highwether, your secrets are safe with us. As ever, we appreciate you taking the time to share some of your personal
details with Shallot readers and hope you're pleased with the election
results.
Note: Glass Shallot Composite Profiles are fictional works composed
of unusually creative fact-assemblage. In other words, they're more
real than reality TV but less real than sit-com dialogue.
You can't do this in journalism, but you can do it on a blog!